Since coming out of hospital 2 weeks ago, iv had some news in the family which has devastated me, i cant see how i will cope. I don't think i will ever learn how to either. It has been a horrible time at home, family being down and upset, seeing family members cry who iv never seen cry before. Plans being made, thoughts being said out loud. Its just horrible. Iv told myself to be strong and just smile, but i cant and iv admitted that i need help and iv been put on some tablets to help my mood. Im also going to be seeing someone i can talk to, to try and help me. And im okay with this. think it will help me allot to vent to someone i don't know. Its okay not to be strong all the time, everyone needs a break from it now and then.
Well due to this i haven't been eating well although im still doing my feeds i haven't put on any weight. My infection levels went up to 75 last week but this week they have come down to 55, but as my doctor has said, its best to put on my IVs for 10 days to get the infection level right down to help me get to my best for transplant. So im now in Papworth, on 3 different IVs 3 times a day, BUT they don't take long to do and the doctors have said i can go home during the day if i wanted too! So now just have to wait for pay day for petrol!!
Also since my last blog i had my 21st Birthday!! YAY! finally an adult!! :D I went to the Harry Potter Studios with Ben, i was amazing, we were both star struck really! Was amazing to see everything they had and walk in the same places they all had! Then at the weekend me and Ben went to my nans and granddads caravan in great Yarmouth for the long bank holiday weekend. It was freezing! Ben got a cold while being there and my PEG played up abit, was very sore to walk and the first day i couldn't walk anywhere. But thats better now. We had heaters on and heated blankets, but was still cold, and the coldness of outside and the heat from the heater was making me cough and making my chest feel quite tight, so we came home on the Sunday but was nice just get away, we had a nice time watching the football and making nachos and watching films with lots of rubbish food :)
Now im still trying to put my weight on, and iv got a target set. Its my uncles wedding end of this month so i need to look good to get a nice dress on...get some chubby legs out ;)
Thank you for reading again!! xx