A very hard day ahead..

So today is the day.

We are saying goodbye to my nanny.

To be honest im really not sure what to say about it, there isn't much to say. I v written something to say but im not sure if i will be able to read it, if not they or my mum will read it for me.

I went with my mum and gramps to see nan again and do her nails, this time instead of being on a bed she was in her casket, white willow with Ipswich town blue on the inside. But as soon as i saw nan i couldn't do it. It was just to hard to see nan like that, but mum done nans nails for me.

Nans favourite colour was Red, so alot of us are wear that colour. Iv got a red dress i know she would love. And my nails are the brightest red for her.

Today is going to be the hardest day of our lives. But were a strong family and we will be there for each other. And really its not a goodbye, shes always with us.

Thank you all for your messages and cards.. we have had so many so its hard to thank you all individually but we are very touched by it all.

My inspiration

On Friday my Nanny finally came home...but she wasn't well at all. She had been in hospital, the hospice and a nursing home. In total she had been away 5 weeks. We were all so excited to get nan home. As some of you know i live with my nan and gramps so i was so exited. My mum is staying with us and my aunt too.

Then on Saturday morning my mum woke me up to the worst news my beautiful Nanny had passed away. My Mum, Aunt and Gramps was with her, so im so glad she wasn't alone. I am just heart broken. Iv never felt pain like this.

My nan is my hero, she made me want to be well and carry on fighting...She was there for me through everything. All the years i had clinics, stays in hospital, when i was feeling upset, happy, we had so many laughs and jokes. I moved in with her and my gramps about 6 years ago. So i am so lucky iv got to spend everyday for the last fews years with her. i wouldn't replace them for the world.

We went to see Ipswich Town play every Saturday for 10 years together. The best days of my life.

I used to do my nan nails alot, so this week me and Gramps are going to say goodbye one last time and il be doing her nails for the last time. I love her so much and miss her even more.

My hero & best friend.